Children and Dogs: Building a Magical Relationship

Children and dogs can share a truly magical relationship, one that fosters love, trust, and joy. Whether you’re preparing your dog for the arrival of a baby or introducing a dog to a home with young children, a harmonious household is absolutely achievable.

Success, however, hinges on preparation and thoughtful management.

From establishing calmness and creating safe spaces to building your dog’s optimism, Games Club offers the tools you need to set the stage for a happy, safe relationship between your children and your dog.

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Bringing a Baby Home

The arrival of a new baby is a major adjustment for everyone - especially for your dog. A baby’s strange sounds, smells, and the sudden shift in household routines can be overwhelming. Babies are, after all, “novelty machines.” They make odd noises, emit unfamiliar smells, and disrupt the norm.

While some dogs adapt easily, others - especially those who are naturally more cautious or pessimistic - may find the changes unsettling. As babies grow into toddlers, the novelty continues. They make noise, they can move unexpectedly, they dress up as fairies and superheroes, they cry when they are upset or unwell. Depending on your dog’s personality, this novelty can be pretty worrying - or it can be a source of huge excitement.

To help your dog cope, it’s important to plan for the changes ahead and set everyone up for success.

One of the best ways you can help prepare yourself and your dog for your new arrival is by listing all things that will be changing in the household when your baby comes home. Aside from the very obvious (there will be a new tiny human in the house), think about:

Change in routine – one or both parents at home rather than at work
Disrupted sleep patterns, night feeding
New sounds and smells
Visitors who want to meet the baby
Lots of extra movement – pacing to help the baby sleep or burp
Feeding routines (whether bottle or breast, this is likely to be novel to your dog)
Noisy toys, play pens, new baby equipment, furniture, and general paraphernalia
Strange noises coming from a baby monitor

That is a lot for you to take on board, never mind your dog! With all these changes, there will be times when your dog needs to be able to rest and relax in spite of a lot of novelty going on around them. They will also need to be cool with flexibility. Their home will suddenly be filled with these unusual sounds and smells. Their walks may not look the same, or happen at the same times as they did before. Think about how you might help prepare your dog for this in advance.

We love to Ditch the Routine for all dogs, but as part of your preparation for a baby coming home this will be vital for your dog’s ability to cope well with all these changes and disruptions.

Understanding Your Dog’s Stress Threshold

Dogs, like humans, have stress thresholds. We like to represent this as a bucket. Stressful or exciting events add to the bucket, and when it overflows, you will see this in your dog’s behaviour. They might bark more, startle easily, or struggle to relax.

The arrival of a baby introduces numerous “bucket-fillers” - novelty, noise, and routine disruptions - which can quickly overwhelm your dog.

Dive deeper into your dog’s bucket by checking out The Brain & Bucket: Understanding Your Dog’s Emotions.

So how can you help your dog be better equipped to deal with all this change?

Preparing Your Dog for Change

Ditch the Routine

It can be easy to assume that dogs thrive on routine, but following a predictable pattern of activities at set times every day creates an expectation that can leave your dog anxious, worried and upset if you’re unable to follow that schedule.

When a baby arrives, routines inevitably change, so helping your dog adapt to a more flexible schedule in advance will ease their transition.

Ditch the Routine allows you to prepare your dog for the unexpected.

Try walking your dog at different times, skipping walks occasionally (while meeting their mental and physical needs in other ways), or taking practice walks with a pram to build positive associations.

Think of all the ways you can help your dog embrace a more fluid schedule:

If you and your partner normally walk your dog together, take them out alone.
Go out at different times of the day, or not at all (there are other ways you can ensure your dog’s mental and physical needs are met without always going for a traditional walk).
Take your dog for a walk with your pram or pushchair and reward calm, appropriate behaviour. If your dog finds this item novel and alarming, start off way further back in the process – apply the principles of Novelty Surprise Party to the pram, gradually introducing movement, then moving it outside, before heading out on a walk. Find this game and hundreds more in Games Club - the home of games based training.

Whether you and your dog love your daily walks, or you already find them stressful, check out our blog, Help! I Hate Walking My Dog for some fun alternatives that may just come in handy for those days when a walk seems a little unachievable.

Want more tips? The free absoluteDogs Ditch the Routine eBook has you covered!

Boundaries, Crates, and Safe Spaces

Once your baby arrives, there will be times when your dog needs to relax away from the action. Teaching your dog to enjoy time alone - whether in a crate, behind a baby gate, or in another room - is essential.

Start this training early, pairing alone time with positive reinforcement to ensure your dog views it as a rewarding experience.

Find a structured 10 Day programme for helping build resilience with alone time in our dedicated 10 Days to Stop Separation Anxiety course.

Building Optimism and Calmness

You can also help prepare your dog for the novelty of your new arrival by topping up their optimism.

Just like humans, some dogs are born optimists while others are more pessimistic by nature. If your dog is naturally optimistic, whenever they come across something new or unexpected they will assume it to be something good rather than something to worry about. If your dog has a pessimistic view of the world, anything new, different, or challenging will trigger feelings of fear and uncertainty. This will include your new arrival.

By playing games that focus on building and growing optimism, you can make your dog’s outlook more optimistic, and prepare them for anything they might encounter in life.

Dive into our free Optimism Rocks eBook for some super games to boost this concept.

Similarly, teaching calmness as a default behaviour will help your dog make better choices when faced with high-energy situations. Some dogs don’t understand calmness as a matter of course. It’s simply not part of their natural decision making process to choose calmness over craziness.

Yet calmness will set your dog up for the very best success, both when your new arrival is turning your once peaceful home upside down with their midnight feeds and their dirty nappies - and when, in the blink of an eye, your newborn has transformed into a toddler!

Watch this fun video to learn why Calmness is King!

Preparing Children for a New Dog

If you’re welcoming a puppy or dog into your family, preparation is equally important for your children. Teaching them to approach the new dog slowly and gently - and explaining that the dog might feel nervous - can foster understanding and empathy.

Involve your children in decisions like:

Where the dog will sleep.
Which areas of the house will be for play, rest, or training.
How mealtimes will be managed (consider ditching the food bowl for training and enrichment activities).

Setting clear ground rules and explaining why they’re necessary will help everyone adjust smoothly.

Supervision and Safety

No matter how trustworthy a dog may seem, children and dogs should never be left unsupervised. Crawling infants and young children don’t understand a dog’s boundaries and might accidentally provoke a defensive reaction. Playpens, baby gates, and separate rooms can help ensure everyone’s safety.

Teach your children to respect your dog’s space and recognise their body language. For example, areas like the chest, shoulders, and under the chin are typically safe for supervised petting, while grabbing tails, ears, or fur should be avoided.

Comparing this to your children’s own preferences (e.g., disliking tickling) can help them relate to the dog’s feelings.

Check out this super episode of our podcast for more expert tips on creating a harmonious household when children and dogs are at the heart of your home: Dogs and Kids: Getting the Relationship Right.

Building a Strong Relationship

Great relationships between children and dogs grow from a foundation of mutual respect and calm coexistence. Surprisingly, less interaction can lead to a stronger bond. Allowing your dog and children to have separate spaces and time apart helps keep stress levels low and fosters a positive relationship over time.

Creating a “gated community” within your home ensures everyone has safe zones. For instance, your children might have a playroom where they can be energetic without worrying about the dog, while your dog has a quiet area to relax and decompress.